


Cracking the Bones

by sainthound



Category: Camp Camp (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Angst, Cannibalism, Deer Kelpies, Elves, F/F, F/M, Gen, Gwom - Freeform, Harpies, Huldras, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Vampires, Werewolves, dadvid, i'll add tags as i go, kind of?? mentions of kelpies eating people
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-21
Updated: 2018-08-22
Packaged: 2019-06-30 14:31:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15753636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sainthound/pseuds/sainthound
Summary: Deep in the forest, dangerous, fantastical creatures and dumbass bitches lurk.Short and sweet oneshots featuring our favourite Camp Campbell campers, and their friends and family, as creatures from folklore. There may be some intentional creative liberties taken, but I take care not to skew folklore from cultures I don't have a right to.





	1. You can lead an elf to a kelpie... (Nerrison)

**Author's Note:**

> I know kelpies are traditionally horses, but I took a little creative liberty and made Harrison a deer kelpie. For those of you who don't know what a kelpie is; they're creatures from Scottish folklore which take the form of horses, lure people onto their backs for a ride, and then drag them into a nearby loch and eat them.
> 
> This is written with the assumption that Harrison was coerced into helping Nerris, or... gently kidnapped. Either way, he doesn't want to be there.
> 
> Enjoy!

"Hi-yah! Come on, loser, move!" 

Harrison stays resolutely still, even when the incessant little elf on his back pulls the makeshift reins so hard the wooden bit hurts his teeth. He digs his tiny hooves into the dirt, and doesn't take a single step.

Nerris groans, pulling his stubby little antlers. "You're supposed to be helping me with my riding. You said."

"And you said you'd let me show you some magic tricks," Harrison retorts, muffled. He tries to pry the bit out of his mouth with his tongue, but Nerris pulls it back.

"Mom and dad told me I shouldn't trust anything you say or go anywhere you tell me to go. Kelpies are liars," she huffs. Harrison hangs his head as best he can in the tight hold of the reins. Eventually, they slacken, and the weight on his back is lifted when Nerris scrambles off. "You're no fun. I'll never learn to ride properly at this rate."

"Maybe you should get a horse," Harrison sniffs, spitting the bit out of his mouth. He glares at her, his cotton puff tail twitching. "I don't like you."

"The feeling's mutual." Nerris scowls, sitting down heavily on a log. She reaches down and draws a few angry lines in the dirt with her finger. "Why can't you just... I don't know, trot around a bit? It's not that hard. Then you could go back to your musty gross-ass lake and-"

"If you're gonna say eat people, don't. I don't do that. I'm a vegetarian," Harrison snaps hotly, stamping his hoof. Nerris stares at him for a moment, before bursting into giggles.

"You're a vegetarian? What, you pull packs of Linda McCartney sausages into the lake?"

"I'm serious!" Harrison whines, sounding pained. "Really! People taste nasty. I never liked them, not even when I was a tiny baby fawn." He scuffs his hoof in the dirt. "I eat berries and stuff. I find them myself, and it's hard, so you can stop laughing right now."

Nerris struggles to keep a straight face, her lip twitching. She readjusts her glasses and coughs lightly. "Okay, whatever. Can we make a deal?"

Harrison gives her a pointed look. "So first you can't trust anything I say, and now you want to strike a deal?"

"I... rethought my worldview," Nerris says carefully. Harrison gives a small snort of a laugh.

"If you let me ride two circuits of the clearing, I'll watch some of your dumb magic tricks. Deal?" Nerris holds out her hand. Harrison considers, before clumsily nudging her palm with his front hoof. "Deal."

Nerris giggles, eyeing his hoof. "How are you gonna do magic tricks with those stubs anyway?"

"A-hah. That's my very first trick. I'll show you later," Harrison tells her mysteriously. He manoeuvres the bit back into his mouth and gives her a nod. "Let's get this over with."


	2. Max's guide to unsafe swimming (Dadvid/Gwom)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, I'm back with another chapter!
> 
> The pacing in this one feels off to me, but I kinda spat it out in a moment of inspiration so I might go back and work into it later! For reference:
> 
> Max is a selkie. He's David and Gwen's adopted son but he's allowed to come and go as he pleases as long as they know he's safe. David is a huldra (based off the Swedish version of the legend, so he has a fox tail). Gwen is a vampire, although this isn't obvious in this chapter. Nikki is a werewolf but has the ability to transform back and forth whenever she likes. And Neil is a harpy!
> 
> Enjoy!

Gwen fumbles for her big iron key with numb fingers, the hood of her cagoule flapping wildly as she lets go of it, before it flies loose. "Shit, fuck-"

The storm began on her way home and gained momentum scarily fast, starting up a howling gale that sent all the creatures of the forest scurrying for shelter. By the time she'd got to the front steps of the little house she shared with her boyfriend and their adopted son, she was soaked to the skin and shaking.

With any luck, David would have some hot food on the stove and a fire in the grate. She hopes so, anyway.

She turns the key and pushes the door open with her shoulder, stepping into the relative warmth and light of the hallway.

"Have you got Max? Is he with you?!"

Gwen holds her hands up as David barrells towards her, his bushy tail lashing anxiously. "Whoa, whoa, let me get inside first." She sets her bag down and shuts the door. "Say it again, David, I couldn't hear over the rain."

"Max!" David repeats, wringing his hands. He looks agonised. Gwen's stomach drops. "What about Max? Is something wrong? Is he sick?"

"He's not come home this evening," David tells her. His lower lip is quivering now, and he sniffs, wiping his eyes furiously. "I-I'm scared, Gwen, he could be out in this storm, alone, oh gosh, what if he's-"

"Pull yourself together!" Gwen bellows, already opening the door again. Her heart is pounding and she feels sick to her stomach. "Let's go look for him. He'll be okay, we'll find him hiding somewhere and chew him out and take him home, safe and sound."

Oh, how desperately she wants to believe that.

She locks the door behind them and the two of them face the wind and rain headlong as they walk into the forest. David's clammy hand clutches at Gwen's and she clutches back, squeezing almost hard enough to hurt. They don't need to speak. They both know where they're going.

"Max? Max!" David calls as they walk. His voice is immediately swallowed up by the storm and answered by nothing but lashing rain.

"Max!" Gwen tries. She pauses to listen, but not even the sharpest ears could hear a reply in this storm. Then, softly-

"Hello? Hiii! Who is that?"

David nearly pulls Gwen's arm out of its socket as he bolts towards the voice, screaming at the top of his lungs now. "Max! Max, it's us-"

They burst through the fringe of trees at the edge of the beach, and shriek as a bundle of freezing wet fur pounces onto both of them, licking and nibbling ecstatically. "Neil, it's David and Gwen! Hi guys, what'cha doing out in the storm?"

"Oh- Nikki, oh my god-" Gwen gasps, pushing her off and straightening up. "Don't fucking do that!"

Nikki laughs, lolloping in a circle and shaking herself off all over them. "Are you here to play storm tag too?"

"Storm- tag?" David splutters. Gwen gives his shoulder a reassuring squeeze. She can't tell if the water streaming down his face is rain or tears.

"Storm tag," Neil qualifies wearily, fluttering down to land beside Nikki, digging his claws into the sand. "It's exactly what it sounds like. I'm not playing."

Gwen bites her lip. "Is... is Max playing?"

Both Nikki and Neil blink at them. "No," Neil replies slowly. "We haven't seen him all day."

"W-we haven't seen him since this morning," David stammers, teeth chattering from the cold.

Nikki wags her tail, butting her head against David's leg. "It's okay, we'll help look for him!"

Neil nods, wringing the tips of his wings worriedly. "I'll fly overhead and see if I can spot him. We'll find him in no time."

Gwen sighs shakily, feeling sick again. "I sure hope so. Let's get looking."

She and David search opposite directions of the shoreline, while Nikki runs as far out into the choppy ocean as she dares, sticking her head underwater and coming back up with seaweed on her ears and water streaming off her fur.

"I can't see anything, it's all frothy!"

"Just keep looking!" Gwen calls thickly. She coughs and chokes back a sob. Max might be a good swimmer when the sea's calm, but he's really only a baby. One big wave, and-

It doesn't bear thinking about.

Suddenly Neil gives a cry from above and swoops towards a group of rain-blackened boulders a little way out into the water, claws outstretched. "I've found him, I've found him!"

David yelps like a wounded animal and dashes towards where Gwen is standing. Nikki pricks up her ears and lollops back onto the sand.

Neil drops out of sight and rises again a few moments later, something large and white and sodden gripped in his claws and weighing him down. Gwen and David run to meet him and he drops the bundle into Gwen's arms, breathing heavily.

"Max?" David whispers, tears streaming down his face. Max is huddled in his soaking wet sealskin, his eyes closed and his body limp. When David touches his cheek, he feels like ice. "Max, oh gosh, Max-"

Nikki sniffs tentatively. "He smells alive," she murmurs. Gwen barely hears her, hugging Max close and trying to warm his little body up as best she can. She squeezes her eyes shut and tries to hold back her stinging tears.

After a torturous moment, Max shivers and clutches at her cagoule. "Nnh..." he lifts his hand weakly and bats David's away from his face. "F-fuh- f-fucking... stop."

"Max!" Gwen hugs him tightly but he squirms free with some difficulty, only to be swept up by David instead. "We thought we'd lost you, oh gosh, Max, we're so relieved-"

"Sh-shut the fuck up, David, I'm fine..." Max complains, but he doesn't try to wriggle away when David and Gwen kiss his cheeks and forehead. "I just... went for a swim and got knocked around a little. Jesus fuck, I'm fine, stop it!"

"Listen here, you little shit, we thought you'd died!" Gwen snaps. Her voice softens and she sniffs as she pulls both David and Max into a hug. "God, we're so fucking glad you're okay. Let's get you home and get you warmed up."

"Can we come?" Nikki asks, bouncing up at them. Max notices them for the first time and groans, pulling part of his sealskin over his face.

"So you couldn't just embarrass me on my own? It had to be in front of the gang?"

David chuckles weakly and ruffles his hair. "You're not embarrassed by your mom and dad, are you?" He glances over to Nikki and Neil. "Yes, I think we all deserve a hot drink. Who's for cocoa?"

Gwen smiles and pats his shoulder. "That sounds amazing right now."

Max snuggles a little closer, looking sulky. "Yeah."

Nikki whoops and runs ahead into the forest, Gwen, David, Max and Neil trailing behind, all wet and exhausted, but relieved.


End file.
